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Movie Review: ‘A Very Flattened Christmas’ – A Bloody, Bizarre, and Hilarious Holiday Horror.

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Even from just the title, you can tell that ‘A Very flattened Christmas’ would be a dark humorous comedy that is set around the very happy holidays of Christmas giving it a gory twist. This feature, co-written by Key Tawn Toothman and Shane Wallace, serves up a blend of slasher horror and comedy with a Christmas backdrop that’s more bloody than merry.

The premise? A group of employees at a roadkill collection company, “Furry Friends,” starts getting picked off one by one by an evil reindeer dead set on killing them all. The big question is, will they survive long enough to figure out who or what is behind the killings? Or will they all be flattened, just like the roadkill they collect?

Right from the opening scene, the film grabs your attention. A man with a bag full of weed gets chased down across a snowy plain and is gruesomely killed by something in a deer costume. It’s a bold choice for an introduction to the weirdness and violence that follow. We quickly learn that the unfortunate victim was Jeff, an employee of Furry Friends, and this death sets off a chain of events following his funeral.

The funeral scene is what seems to set the actual tone for the film. It is not a film that takes itself seriously, and neither should you. The goofy, offbeat characters introduced here are mostly Jeff’s friends and coworkers, all mostly employees of Furry Friends. Jeff’s killing isn’t the last.

One standout character is Max Peters, played by co-writer Key Tawn Toothman, who returns home for Jeff’s funeral. However, not everyone is happy to see him, particularly Rick (played by Jesse Bailey), a former roadkill employee who has now made it big as a filmmaker. Rick’s film, ‘Dick Puncher Saves Christmas’, is cleverly inserted as animated sequences at some points in “A Very Flattened Christmas’, adding an extra layer of bizarre humour to the plot.

Max, the son of the company’s owner, gets invited to the Furry Friends Christmas party, and the murders escalate almost immediately as employees are picked off, one after another.

What adds to the absurdity is the amateurish quality of the film, especially with dialogue that sounds like it was done in ADR rather than recorded on location. This gives the movie an almost campy, low-budget feel. But interestingly, the actors, while not delivering Oscar-worthy performances, are undeniably committed to their roles.

This film happens to be a follow-up to a series titled ‘Flattened’ created by Key Tawn Toothman which I haven’t seen before. This explains why the film doesn’t dwell too much on backstory. The only real hint of history comes in the opening credits with a montage of some scenes from the series in a snow globe, accompanied by the text, “Six years later.” This simple approach to character development leaves you feeling as though the film assumes that all of its audience is already familiar with the strange world it inhabits.

If you’re expecting a tight, well-structured narrative, this isn’t the film for you. There are random, almost nonsensical scenes that feel like they’re included just for the sake of adding to the chaos. Still, despite the disjointed nature, the movie does manage to keep you guessing about who the killer is and what their motivation might be, eventually delivering a climax that ties things up in a way that feels surprisingly coherent for such a somewhat chaotic ride.

Key Tawn Toothman in A Very Flattened Christmas (2024)

At 90 minutes, the film feels longer than it should, not because the scenes drag, but because of how the story winds. By the time the credits roll, you’ll feel like you’ve spent more time with this crew of misfits than you expected. Again, though, this isn’t a film to take too seriously. It’s very much in the “stoner movie” league. A bloody, outrageous comedy that demands little more than that you just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Granted, ‘A Very Flattened Christmas‘ is not a film you watch for high-quality acting, deep character development, or a polished narrative. But if you’re in the mood for something offbeat, gory, and filled with over-the-top holiday horror, it might just hit the spot for you.

I will score this film 5/10 for the fun that it is.

Second on my list of addictions is Movies.. the only thing I could possibly love more is my Dearest Waakye lol. Nothing else does a better job of reminding me that ANYTHING is possible with the right amount of effort. I have great eye for details and flaws in scripts. Shallow scripts bore me. I am an avid reader. Your everyday Mr Nice guy. Always the last to speak in a room full of smart people. Half Human, half Martian but full MOVIE FREAK.

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